Rebel Moon – Part Two: The Scargiver is a science fiction Netflix film from director Zack Snyder who co-wrote it with Kurt Johnstad and Shay Hatten.

Kora (Sofia Boutella) and Gunnar (Michiel Huisman) return to Veldt with General Titus (Djimon Hounsou), Nemesis (Doona Bae), Tarak (Doona Bae), and Milius (Elise Duffy). Expecting peace, they are informed that the Imperium vessel commanded by the thought-dead General Atticus Noble (Ed Skrein) is fast approaching. General Titus agrees to train the villagers and prepare them for the incoming attack. Kora reaches the robot Jimmy (Anthony Hopkins) and asks him to help, but he hesitates, stating that the royal family he once protected is gone. As they prepare to fight, Kora is plagued by memories of her past.

I have already highlighted how Zack Snyder borrowed the homework of way better films to cobble together the plot of this… movie. I will not rehash here, but let me say that my original analysis of Part 1 stands.

Considering the state that Disney is in, it is kind of laughable that they turned down this script and hired Harvey Weinstein’s lackey to make The Acolyte. One would think this is right up Bob Iger’s alley. It hits all of the woke notes.

Inefficient white straight male who has to be bossed around by his girlfriend. Androgynous chick who is good at everything. Evil white straight villain with evil straight white lackeys. Farm girls who have never held a weapon are suddenly sharpshooters. Not one, but three tiny women taking out men three times her size. Yawn-inducing conversations about power dynamics. Girl cuts her pretty hair for no reason. Oh yeah, it is all there.

Besides the pandering, the movie is a “best hits” of the worst of Snyder. Bland characters that have no interesting character development. The dialogue is written with all of the skills of a high school drama teacher. No substance to the story whatsoever, just a bunch of stylistic scenes patched together. Scenes with hammy acting. Vague philosophical conversations that have a lot of “word of the day” calendar synonyms, but ultimately mean nothing.

Aside from that, the movie is just boring. Not even the actors could save it despite their best efforts. The first half-hour is just a farming sim with occasional “bad guys being angry scenes” slipped in. This was followed by terrible strategy and training. I mean, why not… hide the grain? But no, they prop it up within the line of fire and it somehow survives heavy artillery. I mean, are these soldiers worse shots than Stormtroopers? Also, note to Snyder: kicking a dude in the leg does not end them.

All this happens in five days, by the way. Yep. Harvesting grain, setting traps, target practice, a forced romance, characters drinking water are all there, and the anti-climatic battle takes place in less than a week.

For some reason, much of this is in slow motion for no reason. There is literally a scene of a character pouring grain and for some reason, this was slowed down. A lot. It could have been five seconds, but it felt like an eternity. This alone probably added an hour to the run time. I am being cheeky, but it happened so often for the dumbest of reasons.

Apparently, Netflix is sniffing around for some sequels with the possibility of four more movies. I guess if The Kissing Booth got a franchise, Snyder would get one.

Bottom line, Rebel Moon – Part Two: The Scargiver is somehow worse than its predecessor, but perhaps Snyder flicks have found their home on Netflix.

PARENTAL CONCERNS: Strong foul language, Sexual content, Bloody violence

FAVORITE QUOTE: The time has come, for all that you love. Protect each other and show them no mercy!

Check out the trailer below:

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